This Long Stretch of Beach

is lovely in the autumn
I run, my feet mark the sand
between us.

I am Almost Two

and we have been walking along the beach
you say to me, "you are cold and tired
let me wrap you in this blanket and carry you back to the car."
and I say, ok,
but as soon as I start to get warm,
I wiggle and want to run,
so you put me down again.
I hear you behind me calling,
"don't go too far
don't go near that dead seagull
watch out for the tar
don't get wet now
come back!"
but I run without looking,
and get tar on my feet,
and kick the dead seagull,
and get soaked by the wave I didn't look for,
and I have run so far
that I can't hear your voice any more.
I am standing here crying,
wanting you, and wanting to be carried
and warm again;
wanting to just go home,
but knowing I am too wet, and dirty, and far away.
I know you are still calling me,
I could hear it faintly,
if I could just stop crying;
"run back, just run back!"

Down (revised)

Sweet little chick-
hear her, peep peep peep.
Now, put her back in the box.

Baggage

Here, hold this.
It's just a small one,
and this, really, you need this
so hold it too.
I can't carry this
for you anymore,
so you will have to take it back.
I know it's heavy,
That's why I can't carry it.
Did you drop this?
Just pick it up, please.
Here, this is the last one.
It goes where you are going,
so you can just take it along.
You can still see over it;
You'll be fine.
Oh, no you misunderstood!
this is just your carry-on.

Down

See the little chick
isn't she sweet?
so small and light
listen to her speak
peep, peep, peep
isn't that neat?
that's enough now,
put her back in the box.

Ends

I am wrapped
in a thousand balloon strings
flying precariously above the landscape
and you too are wrapped the same way
flying next to me
and we are trying to stay together
we have thought
that if we could just tie all the ends
of the balloon strings together
we could relax and fly
but we can't get them all tied
every time one is tied the other must untie it
the very act of tying
makes the string too tight to bear
so we are flying along
tying and untying as fast as we can
missing the world that is laid out before us

If we could just untie our ends
and hold on to one another
this would be a beautiful and exciting ride

Seal Baby

You slid from my body
like a selkie sheds her skin
Your body white as wax
lay between my legs
the midwife snatched you up
the smell of her panic
as pervasive as garlic
muffled by exhaustion
I merely gazed at her
knowing I had already lost you
and so you couldn't die

Dumpling

A delight
a soft round ball of deliciousness
You smile so big
your eyes disappear
you clasp your hands to your heart
like a little old lady girl
and grin as you burrow into my shoulder
the public adores you
you smile at everyone with equal joy
"I could eat you up!"

Thinner

I am thinner
I am less
I have found again the corners of my skeleton
My bones feel girlishly fragile
My wings are too small and blunt to lift
I look at my hands and see the ropes of my veins
I wonder if that is all that is holding me together
In the heat
my flesh feels heavy on my bones
spongy and dense
I am eating it slowly
I am scraping it away from the inside
If I take enough off, maybe my heart will float instead
of rasping down the grater of my ribs
I have swallowed my tongue
and found that my appetite for argument has disappeared

The Red Glass Room

I think you broke my ribs this time
when my heart broke,
it exploded.
It was the red glass room
I was living in.

Was it really necessary to make a pickax
from the handle of my love?
I thought that you wanted it
to build a house around my heart,
but you stood outside my glass heart screaming,
"You are not naked enough!"
While you swung the ax and called it truth.

Well, here I am
naked and stunned
lying inside the cage of my body.
You stand over me
Holding my love against me.

The Taste of Safety

The taste of death
The taste of silence
The taste of my own tongue
The taste of myself
The taste of nothing
In my mouth

Wedding Dream 2

We were married in a field of poppies,
blood and beauty, forgetfulness.
I wore black, just like my dream,
and the elegance of my neck
was lashed with a red silk ribbon
that trailed down my bare back.
I never saw you.
I only felt your hand
on my back against my heart.
I had a bouquet of pansies and truth,
although my father wanted ravens.
My feet were bare
and the nettles stung
as we were bound.

Love,

I am a peach in your hands.
You have sliced me to the pit
and twisted me loose.
You have forced your thumbs
into the cut, and tearing
you expose my heart, and
my sweetness.

For Chris Hise On His 27th Birthday

You fell into this world
a mistake.
As soon as you could stand
you ran headlong
berserking into life.
But somehow in the end
you took your boots off,
folded your socks neatly inside,
lay down under the stars you loved
(who knew?),
and died.